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Green Blooded Bastard's Movie Commentary Podcasts

The Green Blooded Bastard podcasts primarily feature movie commentaries. While they do not cure cancer or offer profound insights into filmmaking, they may provide a touch of humor, and be warned; I swear a lot. In addition to the free weekly movie episodes, I occasionally post side podcasts on the main feed. These include a Star Trek-focused show titled The Bastard Boldly Goes, a Battlestar Galactica series called Fat Apollo is Life, a Lois & Clark: The New Adventures of Superman commentary known as The Bastard V Lois & Clark, an ALF-themed podcast I Am, Therefore I Watch Alf, and an Ash vs Evil Dead show named Ash vs Evil Dead vs The Bastard. Sometimes, I write bad poetry, create chaos art, and am generally emo.
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Now displaying: Page 1
Jan 12, 2026

The one where Green Blooded Bastard watches The Simpsons Christmas Special. In this telefilm, a slob tries to save Christmas and somehow does.

Jan 5, 2026

The one where Green Blooded Bastard watches A Christmas Carol (1938). In this film, a pale horse rides into the heart of man to show him the errors of his ways or some shit like that.

Jan 2, 2026

Capitalism Kills is a little comic that I threw together and remixed some art that originally apperared in issue 5 of my little ZINE.

Dec 29, 2025

The one where Green Blooded Bastard watches War Is Over!.

 

Here is a link to the film: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W68-XaFepOg

Dec 22, 2025

The one where Green Blooded Bastard watches Once Upon a Snowman. I'd say that this film is a let down, but I'll just let it go.

Dec 15, 2025

The one where Green Blooded Bastard watches Flight Risk. This movie is a brown arrow dumpster fire of fun. Give it a shot or don't, I don't care haha.

In this episode I do dishes, bake some cookies and do laundry.

Dec 8, 2025

The one where Green Blooded Bastard watches Zen - Grogu and Dust Bunnies. Get zen bro.

Dec 1, 2025

The one where Green Blooded Bastard watches The Wonderful Story of Henry Sugar. This fucking film is a wild one. Floating fucks, magic stuff and gambling... what more do you need!?

Nov 24, 2025

The one where Green Blooded Bastard watches The After. This big cocked movie may be short, but size matters not when you have big dick energy!

Nov 17, 2025

The one where Green Blooded Bastard watches The Resemblance. This movie is about a family trying to gain some sort of closure about something to do with their dead son.

Nov 10, 2025

The one where Green Blooded Bastard watches 12 Angry Men (1957). This big cocked movie still holds up and I just found out that they did a remake with a banger cast in the 1990s so I might also do that film too. Fuck it, bro!

Nov 3, 2025

The one where Green Blooded Bastard watches Longlegs. In this film, a pale horse-faced looking fucker named Longlegs is a Satan loving cuck, and there are some strange dolls that do weird shit!

Oct 27, 2025

The one where Green Blooded Bastard watches It's not just you, Murray!. This short film is an award winning film by a young Marty Scorsese.

Oct 20, 2025

The one where Green Blooded Bastard watches Dementia 13.  This movie did some stuff and was ok for what it was more or less I guess.

Oct 13, 2025

The one where Green Blooded Bastard watchesThe Big Year.  This movie is a lighthearted romp that tells a fun story. I didn't watch through the credits becuase I was out of there, but there are some decent postscripts.

Note: The ending of original file is garbled a bit and it sounds like it's almost sped up for some reason so thats fucked up and annoying.

Oct 6, 2025

The one where Green Blooded Bastard watches The Big Shave. The Big Shave is a 1967 six-minute body horror short film directed by Martin Scorsese. It is also known as Viet '67.

Sep 30, 2025

This is a crap little zine that I threw together that I created based on some random art or poems or collage artfuck chaos art that I create while recording episodes or burning time. 

green blooded bastard

Sep 28, 2025

The one where Green Blooded Bastard watches Stealth Fighter. This fucking movie is like an STD that you got from a toilet seat at a truckstop bathroom.

Sep 21, 2025

The one where Green Blooded Bastard watches The Running Man. This movie is like just another in the dytopian 2025 year from hell.

Sep 15, 2025

The one where Green Blooded Bastard watches Disco Inferno. It's another short film that had a decent premise, but failed to stick the landing.

Sep 8, 2025

The one where Green Blooded Bastard watches The Wizard of Oz. This movie is about a girl named Oz and the Wizard that she must hunt down!

Aug 31, 2025

The one where Green Blooded Bastard watches The Hitman’s Wife’s Bodyguard.  This movie is about a character named Hitman who jumps around in space and time to make a film that didn't perform as well as the first one. Have I reviewed the first one or not, I can't remember?

Aug 25, 2025

The one where Green Blooded Bastard watches Forgive Us Our Trespasses. I'm depressed and this short film is slightly underwhelming.

 

Here's a quick haiku that I wrote recently: 

coffee up her ass

as Ben Affleck tea-bagged

her, Gwyneth Paltrow

Aug 18, 2025

The one where Green Blooded Bastard watches The Blue Drum.  This film is a short joint that is fairly effetive for being only 16 minutes long.

Aug 11, 2025

The one where Green Blooded Bastard watches Freaky Friday (2003).  This movie did the old switcheroo and hilarity ensues.

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